Name It as a F***ing One!!

As long as I live until this very second, I've met with hundreds of people. Kindergarten, elementary school, junior high school, senior high school, and now as a college student. It's fun to meet with someone who has a same way of thinking with you, and it is SUCK to meet with someone who apparently never taught to respect another person's feeling. Such a worthless bastard is deserves to be kicked from the society, right?

I've had a point about this one. I have a talent to fully understanding the nature of someone. Just by looking at the person's eye, seeing the person's hand-written, listening to the person's voice tone, watching the person's choose of word, and bla bla bla... I can tell you the person's personality.

If someone asking you, what person do you hate most, what will you say?

I'm gonna' say, an asshole who really knows how to pretend as an angel in front of other people. This stereotype won't be hesitated to do anything, as long as it will makes him/her looks flawless. Pride is nothing but a cheap label for this lame hypocrite. And even more better, he/she surely doesn't mind to sing a crappy song about you to the others. Death to those fuckin' motherfucker!!

The second one. My pick goes to the insolent shithead who always asking for a help, but doesn't know how to say "thank you". You always there to help him/her with everything you've got, but when you need a help, this jerk is just useless as a piece of shit flowing on the banks of a river.

Don't you feel something when you read this entry? I'm not a good person at all, I admit it. But I still have some pride inside my chest. Everybody must know about their place in the society, so stick with the rule. I'm sick with this fact already.

WE ARE (UN)HAPPY FAMILY

Maybe it's a little bit too late for this entry, but perhaps some people feel curious about my crazy classmates with their miraculous behavior, like FAIZAL, our representative from Sampit a.k.a HOMO (I1A008058) who always talk in his sleep (really, it's a fact!!). By the way, because his frigid sleepwalker habit, FAIZAL had lost his notebook and cellphone. How's that possible? Well, according to our journalist, IJEK (I1A008003),, here's the story.

"Once upon a time..."

"Hey, cut the crap out. Come on!!"

Alright, maybe you already know about this,, but you have no idea about this conversation between the robber and FAIZAL (who talk in his sleep other than FAIZAL?)

Robber : "Nang, laptop wan HP km nda ambil lah?! Mau kd?!"
FAIZAL : "Bah, laptop wan HP napa pulang?!"
(believe me, FAIZAL was sleeping when he said this!!)
Robber : "Eh, ya laptop wan hp km lah,, bungul ai!!"
FAIZAL : "Ckk, mauknya km nih!! Nah sana, ambil, ambil!! Bawa dah!! Lajui nah, sampat bangun nda kena!!"
Robber : "Makasih nang lah?"
FAIZAL : "Hiih ha, lajui bungul bukah bangun nah nda!!"

And shit happens to this poor kid...
Better luck next time, buddy.

Well, there's an interesting fact about me and my friends. If you pay attention to our conversation, our choice of words are a little bit... Hm... What is it?! Offensive?! Yeah, offensive. Words such as bungul (No, FARID. I'm not calling you right now. You can go and keep chasing your tail. Oh yes, make sure to learn how to make your tail looks nice with your senior, OMEN), buntat, bala, tokai, etc are daily consumption for us. We never mind about those fuckin' words. We know, our bond of friendship (what kind of bullshit is this???) is far too strong to be broken by this.
Stop it, gays... I said friendship, not a lifetime partner... Sorry, but IJEK and FAIZAL are already kissing each other when I said such a word like friendship. Forgive them, they are mentally unstabled.

Back to the business, besides the using of these offensive words, we also use the term of blood!! Sanguins, yes. We call people with their tribe name. Damn it, it's a shame for this country!!! What the hell did those dickheads think? Don't misunderstood me, I call them with their tribe name just to defend myself from their attack, don't blame me, buddy...

By the way, I present to you know, the participants in this tribe war:

Jreng, jreng, jreng, jreng....

1. Making his lone war appearance, this outstanding bitch is using his horrible "el terrible" moustache to survive in the wild jungle of FK,, the one and only, BALIBUNG (I1A008029) from 'jamban',, oops, Bali!!!

2. Representative from our mother land, Banjar,, this shitty and abnormally ghetto kid already made a devastating discovery, a new disease with the symptoms:

1). Hypermelanocytus (black skin)
2). Facial terratoma (free translation of ugly)
3). Retarded (idiot)

My fellow comrade, ADEL (I1A008025) calls it FARIDISITIS, but the true owner prefers SYNDROME MFR (M. FARID RAKHMAN). Yes, please welcome our next contestant, FARID (I1A008039)!!!

3. From Madura, this pair is ultimately 'sakau'!! The 5-years-old-too-skinny-vegetarian-girl, IJEK (I1A008003) and a hybrid between Madura and Rantau making her first step to my blog, ZUN (I1A008024)!!! Probably the best pair ever, they are such a formidable opponents for everyone.

4. This tribe is best known for their "horas bah", yup, Batak is here too!! Please welcome, the group of Batak with 2 pure blood and 1 hybrid, HANA I1A008072 (Siregar lah) and WANNA I1A008032 (Sitepu lah) and your old pal, stinky junky bitchy I1A008004, OMEN (Purba cing)!!!

5. From the darkest, remotest, far far away abandoned land of demolition, 'Jorong',, this dwarf also makes his first appearance in my blog,, I'll be damned when I call his name... NAKJONG (I1A008036)!!!

6. It's not complete until we have a representative from 'Jawa', and of course we have one here!! This kid has an abnormal jihink-jihink habit, which makes me wonder, is he ever comes to his sense? Anyway, JIHINX (I1A008035) is in the house!!!

7. Save the best for the last, the best tribe ever which fills this earth with our outstanding wisdom and glory, the one and only 'Cina'!!!!!!! Bravo, bravo, bravo!!! Magnificent!! We have 5 representative here, but only 3 are counted ghetto,, myself, COSHITES SANDY (I1A008056), PAT KAI (I1A008034), and MENTALIS A.K.A ADEL (I1A008025)!!!

Well, that's all... I know, from 83 person I didn't take them all, just a few as a sample here, and I know, these poor victims above won't be hesitated just because of this kind of shit,, because of what? Well, I already told you, haven't I?

It's just because...

WE ARE (UN)HAPPY FAMILY

Phobia

Yup, it's time to talk a little bit about science, or nothing about the science at all!! Haha, did I get you?

Thanks to my pet, OMEN (I1A008004), for his entry on his miserable yet so pathetic blog, he makes me remember about a harassment of our not-so-ugly friend, the one and only IJEK (I1A008003)!! Due to the topic, of course our not-so-ugly friend here was the victim of the juvenile criminal asshole named BALIBUNG (I1A008029) who wants revenge for his unreasonable inhal in digestive test. He feels curious, why did IJEK manage it to escape from the brutal bind of inhal. I know, buddy. Envy is such a pain in the ass... Sometimes you have to let go of it.

Stick to the plan, the event took place on IJEK's house, like always. We were hanging out there, waiting for the right time to go. Me and BALIBUNG want to go to Martapura, to return the typing machine to my uncle.
You know, people always said this: It's better to hunt in a group than alone, so I persuaded OMEN and IJEK so those gays would be agree to accompany us to Martapura. Here is the result of my persuasion:

OMEN: Ayu ja dah, aku handak selajur nukar nasi goreng nah = True
IJEK: Bah, koler. Handak jd anak muda nah (having a chit-chat with his girl) = False

IJEK made a terrible mistake here, fellows. Our fascist coordinator (most likely dictator), BALIBUNG never accept a rejection from his useless subordinates. This poor kid surely have to change his pervert mind as soon as possible, before our shitty coordinator takes another step forward, but, he didn't.

You're done for, kid.

BALIBUNG spins his un-girus brain. We know since the very early day of mankind, violent is the best persuasion ever. Suddenly, his eyesight brings him to a yellow, round-shaped thing on the table. What was that thing? Well... It is a...












"Dude, what was that?"

"It's an electric racket, dickhead..."

Using his brute force, BALIBUNG threatening IJEK with the racket, whilst me and OMEN were watching this decisive battle with a laugh. IJEK, unarmed and uncovered, couldn't do anything except squeezing a pillow and screaming like a 5 years old-too-skinny-vegetarian-girl. I wonder, if the scene were continued further, IJEK would have pee on his pants. To prevent any meaningless bloodpouring battle, I tried to help this 5 years old-too-skinny-vegetarian-girl. He finally agreed to go with us, saving his life from BALIBUNG's rage. Way to go, mamen!! That's how you solve the problem, clean and cheap.

So, now you know IJEK's phobia. You can do it too, just get an electric racket and everything's gonna' be easy. And just like OMEN's milk said: Trust me, it works.

Sucks...

Tutorial is suppose to be fun, where several of us discuss about a case in a tiny-sometimes-too-hot-or-too-cool room,, but it turns out to be SUCK as the time goes by... Why??? Yes, yes, yes... I am here to explain it to you now.

Night before the tutorial, I used to be preparing everything I've got for tomorrow,, reading, understanding (trivia for you: under = bawah, standing = berdiri.
Understanding = yang dibawah berdiri,, but that's not what I mean, If you got the idea...), and finally memorizing the material. Sometimes it takes more effort for me since I have to make a scheme (usually from Harper, yes, Harper. That fatty but surprisingly important and helpful yellowish book) if I want to explain about a complicated biochemist reaction, like Gluconeogenesis, or other stuff like that. And it works nicely. As you can see, I'm still kickin' until this very day. You can do it too. Feel the rhyme, buddy...
I've made up my mind since the very early day, I know it's fine to bring your textbook in the second tutorial, but for the sake of humanity and to prevent my back from kyphosis, also to sharpen my ability, I forbid myself to read (in other words, copy-paste) from the book while we're having a discussion. and so far so good, it helped me in several occasions. You look cool (hmm...) when you're explaining without taking a peek at your textbook. It makes you gain enough respect from your foes, and respect is important, it can intimidate your foes even before they try to confront you in a tongue-war. Suck it out, guys...

As the time goes by, I finally able to extract one thing in a common, something that turns out to be a daily habit, something that corrupts our mind (what?). A needle inside my flesh. 90% of students (don't count me in, please... I still have some pride in my chest) always bring their GABANIC textbook to the tutorial. That's fine, actually. I am cool with that. You bring them in, you're willing to take the risk. Don't blame anyone if you find out that your spine is curving 2 years from now on.
So, where's the shit is? Things are getting ugly when those lazy bumps finally realize how to cheat this rule. Without even studying a single phrase from the book, you can take it to the room, simply put it on your FEMUR,, and begin to read it. And voila, it seems that you're already memorizing the phrase, but I am aware about this, guys... I am not fool enough to fall into your plan.

I know, maybe when you read this entry, several people will be mad at me, but I DON'T GIVE A SHIT about it. I just want to set a clear line between pure intelligence+hard work and laziness+creativity. For those who feel insulted by this entry, what about making yourself think outside the box from now on? Someone please do something about it, because I'm fed up with this fact already.

18 Years Old

Exactly at the end of January I always have to admit that I'm one year older than before. A question always pops out from my friends:

"Where will you celebrate it?"

Frankly, I feel sorry for them, it's a clear sign that they still don't get it. Why do we have to celebrate our birthday? I mean, if you're getting older, isn't that mean you'll be one step closer to your death? Isn't it too obvious? God, If I could I wished that I will never aging, just like Peterpan...

Just from the label you know that I'm 18 years old now. I was born in a small town near (not so near, actually) the southern shore named Pelaihari. I wasn't born in a hospital, just inside a small, fragile, old house which belong to my granny. My parent still don't have their own house at that moment. I was born premature, 8 months and 2 weeks with my weight about 2.3 kilograms. The day was Thursday, I took my first breath at 6 PM. Do you think my birth time is cool, huh?! Thursday at 6 PM, at the beginning of Friday knight. I am proud with this fact.

I grew up a little different from another kids. I spent most of my time lying on the bed, because I was very prone of getting sick. If I recall, I always meet with dr. Suryadi Anang every month, at least 2 times in order to find the right medicine to cure my tonsillitis. The worst of all happen when I was 2 years old. After a blood test in the laboratory, a doctor (I forget his name) told my parent that I was suffering from leuchemia. Couldn't agree with the doctor, they brought me to another laboratory, hopefully the result would be different, and fortunately it was. The doctor said I wasn't suffering from leuchemia. It's just a complication of various disease.

My granny told me, someday my parent took me at 3 AM to Banjarmasin because my body temperature rose greatly. My father, because he was so sleepy, forced to eat coffee powder because there were no hot water at that time, and even at one point, he had to stolen some herbal leaves from other people's house. I was amazed with that story. Even my father in his daily live is so strict to me, the story proves his unbearable love for his son.

I was raised mostly by my great grandmother and my great grandfather (the parent of my grandmother) because my parent was too busy with their shop. They are still alive until now with their age almost 100 years old. I am honest, they are my inspiration why I want to become a doctor. I wish someday I'll be able to cure them with my own hand, to show my appreciation for their endless love to me.
We slept in my great grandmother's house too. Every year because the house is located near a river, the house was trapped in a flood tide. I was very happy when the flood came. It's time to have a free, all day round swimming time, isn't it? Every little kid must feel this way too, right?

I used to have two brothers, but one of them died when he was born. Like me, my brother is a premature too, but my brother couldn't make it. I was 2 years old, so I don't remember a lot about my deceased brother. All I remembered until now is his funeral, where little me asking everyone why did my brother slept inside a small box, which turn out to be my brother's coffin. It was sad, actually. If he had alive maybe now he's a student in a senior high school, and we could spent a lot of time together...

I am a prodigy amongst other kid around me, I already able to read when I was 2.5 years old. When I was 3 years old, my auntie taught me how to write beautifully, and mostly about mathematic. I've sign into a kindergarten when I was 3, the youngest attendant at that moment. I am very interested in English, and I've started to speak English since I was 4 years old. I learned mostly from the movie, imitating how the actress speak.

An accident occured when I was 4 years old. When my grandpa took me to the school by motorcycle, suddenly a man crashed our motorcycle from behind. I was fell aside, my head strucked directly to the hard asphalt. Firstly, I felt nothing at all. But suddenly the pain came to me like a thousand needles piercing your head at once. I cried loudly, and after that accident for some reasons I was forbid using a pillow for a month. I still believe until now, the accident had reduced my intelligence, if it wasn't happen I'll be smarter than Einstein, huh...

As an elementary school student, many kids bullied me, just because I'm small and especially since I'm a Chinese. I really hate it when they call me "cina, cina...". If they dare to call me like that again, I am really gonna' slice their throat with my scapel. It was very hard for me to have a friend at that moment. Luckily, I still have a few good friends. There were seven of them, and we still become a good friend until now, although now we have to separate from each other.
I also had a very close friend, a girl named Dede. Our parent is a good friend too, so it's not hard for their child to become close enough. In fact, while I'm still 5 years old, still on the first grade, we kiss each other on the middle of the class. Hohoho... That was really fun, to see how shocked were our friends.

When I was on the third grade, I've started to observe everything around me, either my environment or people around me. Then I saw my father. He always smoking. I felt curious with this, and finally I want to try how to smoke like my father. I stole a box of cigarette from my parent's shop, and started to smoke when I'm still 7 years old. Really, I was smoking at that time!! My curiousity didn't stop just like that. I stole every kind of cigarette, and taste them one by one. Bentoel, Gudang Garam, Marlboro, Sampoerna, Dji Sam Soe, Crystal, Wismilak, just name them. I only stop because one day my mother finally knew about this mischievous act by me, and I have to stop my smoking habit since that day.

I graduated from my elementary school as the best student in the history of my school (remember, I'm a prodigy, hehehe...). Because my mother always worried about me, she forbid me when I said I want to go to Banjarmasin. So I was trapped once again in Pelaihari, as a student of SLTPN 1 Pelaihari. Sigh...

I am a good boy, a really good boy when I'm a freshman at the junior high school. I don't know how to say bad words, or any other nasty thing like porn video. But thanks to my new friends in the high school, I've tainted by them, brainwashed by them. And the result is the ME that you know now. But it's okay, I feel grateful for them. I don't want to become a NERD. Thanks guys, for making me better.

In the junior high school I couldn't be the best in my school, because there was a handicap. My eyes were injured by my bad habit. I spent too much time in front of TV because I'm a game freak. This situation is getting worse with my secondary-bad habit. I love to read comic while I'm lying on the bed. I couldn't see normally, thus I couldn't see the lesson on the blackboard, and VOILA, I spent three years without any explanation from my teacher just because this eye problem. But why didn't I tell my parent? I want to, but I don't have the nerve to tell them. What will happen to my playstation if I told them? They will forbid me to play again, and that's surely gonna' kill me, man... Gaming is a primary needs for me.

Graduated from the junior high school, I, again, trapped in this small town, in SMANPEL. I became the member of class XA, the wildest, most rebellion class in the history of my school. This is the worst moment in my life, the nastiest one too. Once again I tried how to smoke with my friends, and spent most of our times by hang around beside the street, doing nothing except for smoking or playing music as a band.
An incident happen again this time, but it was completely my fault, here goes the story:
It was a Sunday night. I supposed to go to the church, but instead of doing so, I lied to my mom, and I went with my friends, spin around the town, and stopped on the dark spot for smoking, and whatever nasty thing like that. I still remember, the cigarette we smoked was WISMILAK (sounds like wish me luck, right?), but this is very ironic, considering what happen to me next. One of my friend asked us to race each other, and we agreed. Suddenly while my motorcycle ran so fast (it's about 90 kph), I lost my grip because there was a dump of sand on the road, my motorcycle is sliding, and I hit the road-divider. My body was launched because the crash, and I smashed to the hard asphalt, shoulder first. Because I am strong (hmm...), I stood up instantly, only to found my face already covered in blood. There were horrible cuts on my face, and the blood keep on streaming. My fingers were hurt badly, too. My friends took me to the hospital right after I stood up. The nurses sewed my finger because the cut was too deep and it couldn't stop bleeding. Both of my parent, my grandma, my auntie, everyone else were yelling at me because this accident. My right shoulder was nearly broken, at that moment my right shoulder shape was different with the left one. I couldn't move my shoulder for one week. All of my activities were helped by my grandma.

To be continued...

One After Another, and You're Still...

Credits finally shown up!!

And apparently I've got enough score to achieve, if not exceed, my target... All hail and praise for my Lord Jesus Christ
I'm fully aware with my endless respect for my Lord's help in my life,
Without Him I am nothing, but within Him I believe anything could happen in my life.
But yet I'm still a worthless son who never makes Him happy, yet I'm still full of sin,
But yet He's so nice and kind, His tenderness always stay with His children and keeping them safe under His wings,,
Thank you Father, for everything You've done in my life.

Wake Up!!!

It's very seldom for me to discuss about my own flaw (because I'm a flawless person, you know) but like they say: "Even a squirrel will failed a jump", so that's happen to me. I'll tell you what.

Sunday, January 18 2009 AC
The day of TM 2. It would be held at 7.00 AM.
It was a beautiful day. The birds were singing I Write Sins Not Tragedies (what?! How could a bird sang an alternative song?! whatever...). The sunshine passed through my slightly opened window, flooding my face with enchanted power of the morning, giving me a new hope, new passion, new determination....
I open my eyes slowly and look at the clock:
7.05 AM.

Oh shit...
I woke up late.

Suddenly, my N95 (ehhhmm..) ringing. It was a phone call from Pat Kai (You know him...). I picked up my phone, said something (my mind were working super fast at that time, I can't remember what I said to him), ran to the bathroom, toothbrushing, and change the wardrobe.

So...

HELL YEAH, I DID NOT TAKE A BATH!!!

I rode my way as fast as I could to the campus, only to find that the meeting isn't held yet. Damn man, if I knew about this I would take a bath first. But that's fine, nobody could say it. I am as cool as always, either I took a bath or not.

And now I know one thing: I am not the only one who didn't take a bath at that day, there are approximately 2 other person who didn't either. One of them is MR. NAKJONG (couldn't ask more from him), and the other one? Let's keep it as a secret, she will be mad at me if I told you guys... WAIT!!! Did I just say "she"? Oh crap, that's your clue... She's a girl. OK, that's all. Find out her ID yourself. Khukhukhu...

When the meeting finally opened, it's the day of revelation for us, the revelation of mountainous tasks for these unfortunate students. The tasks were:

1. We have to make a data of ourself, consisting of full name, nick name (like TOKAI for F****, BALIBUNG for D***, etc), place and date of birth, religion, recent and past address, our quote, skills and interest, and the name of high school where we came from with a close up (not the toothpaste, you dickhead) photo in a same format for 223 people.

Sounds easy, right? But my pet named Faizal did this job 3 days nonstop, causing him to degenerate from a human form into a homo form (oh, sorry. But Faizal is in homo form from the beginning, yes...). Poor Faizal, he was so tired until he finally slept on the chair in Ijek's house... And that's a BIG, BIG mistake, my friend...

Armed with a board marker, the evil genius Ijek (I1A008003) started to crafted his newest contemporary art: Face painting with our tender model Mr. Faizal from Sampit!! Oh yes baby, that's what happen if you caught up off guard in that devilish smelly cursed house. Ijek steps forward, feeling his own passion peaking in front of nicely, cute, sleepy Faizal (That's because IJEK IS A HOMO too, my friend... Don't be fooled by his outer appearance). Ijek shuts his eyes, feeling his soul screams for a new victim, and his right hand finally moving on its own like Michaelangelo painting on the ceiling of Basilica St. Peter (that's a trivia for you guys). Next to Ijek our photographers were ready with their own cellphone. Like Darwis Triadi they started to take picture of our role model from various angle. Watching this character annihilation, I only do nothing but pray for Faizal's soul, let him in peace and stay there for eternity (As if he's already dead, hehehe...).

Want to see the upcoming picture of our beloved friend Faizal after the revolutionary make over? I present to you now:














I am sorry brother, freedom of speak sometimes drives you out of control...

2. We have to cover a 20-pages book with a green paper for boys and orange for girls. No problem with this task. I've got nothing to complain for.

3. Typing 25 names with their NIM each from PSPD, PSKM, PSIK, and PSPsi using a typing machine. No problem again, I am a good typer. My fingers are made for this job.
But I found out one of my friend, (again) Ijek was having a problem with this job. He can't stop complaining about his typing machine. He is do less and talk more. Come on, gay... Can't you see Nawis doing his job easily? If Nawis can, why don't you?

4. Making a name tag, with 4 flower petals around it. I didn't do this job since it was BALIBUNG and MR. NAKJONG part of work. On the front side of the name tag we have to type our full name, NIM, study program, quote, and our disease history. On the rear side we put our close up photo with a cartoon or anime character that resembling ourself. I want to use Fye D. Flourite at the begining, but instead of Fye I finally took Kon from BLEACH... Damn it.
Adding to my surprise, many of those lack-of-self-recognition people using a divinity, pretty, goddess character like Yuna (oh please, Yuna? An angel like her?) and Rinoa (God, please forgive their insolent soul). If someone using Aerith's photo, I'll stab her from behind. Really.

5. Bringing various item like mineral water, bread, and sock with the same format again. Easy task. I never concerned about it, actually.

That's not done yet. On the first day of LKMM we have to wear a black shirt with a white, homo-like long pant and a black shoes. This situation is getting worse since we must wear our shitty yellow suit, making us look like a walking piece of shit.
Frankly speaking, I still can go on with the task and the dress-code, really. But what I hate most is when they say:

WE HAVE TO SHAVE OUR HEAD LIKE A DAMN MARBLE!!! LIKE A DAMN TUYUL!!! OH, FOR A GOD SAKE!!!

Haven't you had enough with the P2B? Now I have to let my priceless hair cut off once again? What kind of humiliation is this? Is this a new form of imperialism? Where's GOD? Is fairness lost from this world? What is the meaning of freedom of expression? What is the meaning of democracy? Constitutionals are just a nice talk of a bloody god damn hippies? Fucking shit!!! Hiks...

Say this people:

HOLY SHIT!! HOLY SHIT!! HOLY SHIT

Various way were suggested by our freedom warrior like Albert, Farid, Felix, Mustaqim, etc to prevent this ghoulish, full of world government conspiracy plan from becoming reality, but the defense of The Scourge (what?!) consisting of Fajri, Fatria, Yosef, Putra, and Oky were too tight and strong... We have to admit our defeat, we have to admit that we're the loser. So then, ADIOS AMIGO... I'll have to wait another half a year for my hair to grow long again...

We cut our hair together in a barbershop at the end of Banjarbaru. And whoah... Our heads are back to bald again!! Adding to our pain, one of this crappy baldy kid named (again) Ijek once again proved that he's a pure idiot by asking us to go to Andre (some kind of cafe where you can eat, drink, or just sit while having fun with your worthless friends,, a trivia for fucking NERDs).

What's wrong with going to Andre after you cut off your entire hair?

Andre is a place where youngster usually hang out together. 6 persons showing up in Andre with a baldy head? I'm afraid if someone say this:

BEHAPA GUNDUL-GUNDUL NINI? HANDAK MAIN BANGA KAH?

Suddenly, a woman came in while holding her baby (since he's a baby of course he's bald). And then Ijek's baldy head glowing in the dark like a lamp, means he just got a bright idea. With a shitty expression, Ijek asks the baby:

KENAPA DING GUNDUL JUA? HANDAK LKMM JUA KAH DING?

...

...

So, that's the beginning of a horror disguised behind an activity named LKMM, next I'll tell you what happened to us on those 2 days of LKMM. Please wait patiently.

An Elite Group in My College

It's common for every college to have a brotherhood, where people with the same ideology or characteristic join together to simply communicate each other. So on, it also happen in my college.

But, when most of the fraternity (other word for brotherhood, a trivia for the dickheads) is a public group where everyone can join them as long as they're cool (NERDs are out of count,, go death for NERDs!!!), this group is just amazing, highly exclusive. This group opens only for those who had been recognize as BUNGUL (not because they're stupid, but for their unidentified, unthinkable, unbelievable, inhuman attitude and personalities) person only, and the member is much more exclusive: There are only 3 members, with one Skipper!!! Wanna' know these people more personally? Here we go, sucka'!!


1. Skipper, for the sake of human right let's just use his ID number: I1A008077
This person comes from the darkest, wildest, most dangerous place on earth, A L A B I O where the poor ducks are slaughtered and become the main dish in every god damn house in Alabio.

You guys must take a note, this skipper is undefeated in the term of inhal. He's a veteran in inhal, and never gives a chance for other people to have a place on the inhal list. In addition, this skipper is a real pervert, and the only thing you can find in his self phone is sex videos. No wonder he's trying his best to become the next coordinator for reproduction block. And yup, he's the strongest candidate until now.

For your information, we give points for those who had done several unidentified, unthinkable, unbelievable, inhuman attitude and personalities. Especially for inhal, we give the person +10 point. Since our skipper never skip an inhal (that's our CAPTAIN for you!!), his point is on the top of everyone else, and looks like nobody would have defeated him from this aspect. So, in order to honor our captain, we granted the title SKIPPER for him... What a great achievement for this idiotic person!!!

2. BUNGUL 1, I1A008039
He's completely different, he's completely out of equation, and he's completely (in the term of Hermawan) TOKAI. If our skipper gets most of his point from inhal and his pervert attitude, this TOKAI is even more better!! He gets points from:


1. Inhal (but lately he's studying hard, so now he gets inhal rarely,, way to go, creepo)

2. His unthinkable skill in riding a motorcycle (can you imagine a motorcycle rides alone without its rider? But it's actually happen to this boy). Also he had various accident already, leaving his motorcycle zombie-like. Poor VEGA R... And the best part of this accidental story, a tattoo-like scar on his face!! But that's cool, like Sasuke's power seal from Orochimaru. I kinda' like his scar, makes his face even more "handsome" (you know what I'm talking about, dude...)

3. His expression when we do the Cheers!! God damn it, he's one of the main weapon we have!! The truth is, he doesn't even know half of our movement,, but it's covered by his "COOL" expression.. Paired with Mr. Najong a.k.a AMANG YOSI with his exceptional pervert expression,, they become a formidable pair on the right flank. Keep it up, guys!!


That's all for this (again, term by Hermawan) Tamagotchi, there's not enough space for him if you want to know all of his marvelous attitude. Let's move on to the next person.

3. BUNGUL 2, I1A008035
He's coming from Banjarbaru, and he's ready to take over the crown of the first BUNGUL from I1A008039!!!
Actually if you see this person for the first time, there's nothing wrong with him. I mean he's glasses and behave normally. He gets inhal rarely too. So, what's wrong with him?
Well, if you stood by him in about 1 hour, you'll find out yourself. This boy has an abnormally attitude (by the mean of adaptation, maybe) to always JIHINK-JIHINK. You call him N**** (his name), he JIHINK. You call him idiot, he JIHINK. You call him Brain's oedem, he JIHINK. Weird.
But above all, this person also has a horrible weapon: He's LOLA (LOading LAmbat), or TELMI. Most of his points come from this one. The examples are too many, but one of them is this:

We were talking about PAT (Program Alih Tahun), but suddenly this son of darkness said: "Hah?! THT? Apa tuh?"

Go DEATH!! But don't go death too soon, coz' he's also the member of our CS first team. Lucky you...

4. BUNGUL 3, I1A008004
Here he comes, the last BUNGUL. This one is a hybrid between BATAK and DAYAK, making him a new species called BAYAK. Comes from SMASA Banjarmasin, he always claims himself as an outrageous person (I agree, in term of stupidity and idiocracy). He's planing on a coup de etat against our coordinator, BAGI, but since he's a CHICKEN, he stopped his ambition and turned around into a Key_Jail member!! What an easy-betrayal person!!

Well, it's hard to me to say this, but this one also rarely gets his points from inhal. His attitude is almost normal too. But, yes, there's a but. This boy has a secret habit, he loves NYIMENG!! That's why he loves to humiliate other person, especially his fellow comrade B1 and B2 (like vitamine B complex). To prove his outstanding attitude, I'll tell you a factual story about this BAYAK.

Saturday, January 9 2009. I was in Ijek's house together with this shitty kid to study about religion (don't ask me why I am willing to study with this kid, everyone makes a mistake, okey). We sat on the living room. But suddenly, this creature sounded a strange voice from his ass:
"pruuutt..."
Yup, this dickhead just farted in front of me.
Defending himself, this ugly unidentified creature said this:
"Mamen, santai aja pang, biasa aja lawan sesama lakian kaya ini"
That's just before he smells something stinky enough to make a rhinoceros run away. So then, this creature was surrounded in an invisible thick wall of his own fart, rolling in despair to find a fresh air while saying:
"uma baunya, bangsat baunya kantut unda"

... No comment.

If you want to know more about this piece of crap, visit his site at mahasiswaluarbiasa.blogspot.com

Well, I think that's enough for today... It's not good to reveal everything about these guys, because it's like unveiling our college biggest mistake...
Remember, STAY AWAY FROM THESE GAYS!!

Another empty days...

Some people say if you become a college student, especially if you are a medical faculty student,, there won't be a day without study, assignment, and group discussion..
And hell yeah, that's obviously happen in my life right now.


I dedicate most of my time to read a god damn thick literature that I hardly understand, doing my assignments, trying to remember how to do various medical technique, finding and translating journals for my report, looking for a bunch of material for the tutorial, etc. But somehow now I feel those boring activities already become a part of my daily life...

It's not like that I'm a nerd (I am gonna' slice your stomach open if you dare to think that I'm a nerd, really) , but I feel something is missing when I have a vacant time like now... It is my holiday, so it's time to relax my mind and forget all about college for a while... But it's like something in my head tells me to study rather than wasting my time to do these useless activities... What happen to me? Do I have become a NERD? Oh god, I'd rather kiss my own ass and fuck a *******...

Just like the law of nature, it looks like I'm already adapting, and get used to be a workaholic. That's fine, I can take it. But there's one thing now that bothers me most, it's about the citizen test this Saturday. Why???

I have no hard feeling for the lecturer, really. But it's just my nature. Since I was 6 years old until now, I've never enjoyed this lesson. I mean you don't have to know about the very content of your country's constitution unless you are a president, right? For me, a good citizen is a person who pay the tax regularly, obey the rules and law above anything, and VOILA, that's all. All I know since I'm an elementary school student until now is PANCASILA ADA 5. Don't ask me what are they, I always forget the fourth one. It's too long.
If there's anyone out there agree with me, please raise your finger, and put it into your nose, hehehe... Besides that, the materials are so much, which in scientific language called "SEGABAN", this lesson is full of ****, it can makes you bored to death, or drooling on the top of your chair's table. This lesson is a mass murder, man...

I feel anxious, why do we have to study about citizenship? I mean, if we become a doctor someday, I am sure you'll never ask your patient like this:

You: Selamat malam pak/bu, saya dr. Rohman, kalau saya boleh tau nama Anda...
Patient: Saya Pak Sulcus a.k.a Farid (for example)
You: Jenis kelamin Anda?
Patient: Laki-laki, tetapi P**** saya mengalami rudimentasi, sehingga sekarang saya...
You: Ya, saya mengerti, kita lanjut saja ke pertanyaan berikutnya. Keluhan Anda apa?
Patient: Saya kalau malam suka panas, batuk-batuk, muntah darah, dan pingsan dok...
You: Oh ya, apa pengertian WAWASAN NUSANTARA menurut Anda?
Patient: Hah? Apa dok?
You: Tidak tau ya? Kalau begitu apa pengertian dari ZONA EKONOMI EKSKLUSIF?
Patient: What the fuck are you talking about, you dickhead?









Oh dear...

So guys, that's why I dislike this lesson, but once again I never said that I don't like the lecturer, I am just having problem about how to befriended the citizenship lesson...

Miraculous Day!!

I know my Lord is da' best!! Yeaaaahhh!!!

Thanks to my Lord, Jesus Christ,, I've passed the final examination. I am fully aware that could not happen if I try by my own power, it's all because of You.. Praise the Lord, yeah!!!

Digestive Test: MESSY and SCREWED UP!!

Today's test:

Complete Disaster.

That's all.

I think I've studied hard enough, but the outcome is nothing... Darn!!

Take this image here

First number, I've started as soon as possible, I felt confidence with my ability. Everything was good, I red the question,,

and...

"Damn it..."

"I need help, ASAP!!"

I moved to the next question, same result... 

Number 3, nothing's change.

RED CODE, RED CODE!! NEED BACK UP AS SOON AS POSSIBLE

I stretched my neck to the right side,, Fahmi Abdullah Kusyanto, I1A008063 was sitting next to me. The outcome is nothing but a blank page. Good job buddy,, I know that a clean paper is the last thing I need for that moment. 

Second option: Rear wing. Mustaqim Apriyansa Ramadhan, I1A008020 was stood up there. It's a good reinforcement actually, but the risk was just too high,, it was very risky to call for him, and even if I try to stretch my neck,, that would be meaningless coz' dr. Lena was keep looking at my direction,, 

Well, it looks like the Big Guy wants me to do my own test,, cheat free. Okay. I Skipped the first three questions, and started to find my grip again. The rest is like always, you do the math.

BUT... Yes, there's a but...